💥👻🥋 NEVER LOSE? The Crypto Betting Secret for Karate Combat

Issue #63

Issue #63

Good Morning Cryptonauts, this is issue #63. Big things are happening, Russia just pulled into Havana with a warship and new model attack sub, and Saudi Arabia decided to not just sell oil in USD officially ending the 50-year reign of our Superpower status, Biden is attempting to appear a little more crypto-friendly, US weekly jobless claims hit 10-month high; producer prices fall, etc. We are living in interesting times, to say the least. The Crypto markets are not responding wildly as expected. So, buckle up while we chat about Karate Combat, which is completely unrelated.

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Updated June 13, 2024

Karate Combat - $KARATE

Crypto Boo in the pit.

Alright crypto brosephs, listen up! Karate Combat is taking the brilliant concept of watching dudes kick the stuffing out of each other and giving it a deliciously absurd crypto twist.

First off, you'll actually get 88 free KARATE tokens just for downloading their app and creating a wallet on the blazing-fast Hedera blockchain. Forget about punching the clock, these tokens let you get in on the real action!

Before each live karate beatdown event, you get to play fight promoter by picking your favorite martial artists to win. If your guy emerges victorious after pummeling his opponent into the fabric of space-time, you get a 90% cut of KARATE token rewards! It's like betting but without the pesky risk of losing money.

But here's the real kicker - even if your fighter gets his face rearranged, you don't lose a single token thanks to their revolutionary "up-only gaming" model. Rake in profits or preserve your stack, you literally can't lose!

As a token holder, you get a say in how the whole shebang is run by voting on fantasy fight matchups, rules, and whatever else the Karate Combat devs can think up to keep this crypto cage match absurdity going.

To see these real-life karate rocks 'em sock 'em robots in action, just tune in to their YouTube channel and other free streaming platforms. No need for pay-per-view - the shilling and tomfoolery are all-inclusive!

With legendary MMA ambassadors like Bas Rutten, Georges St-Pierre, Lyoto Machida, and Stephen "Wonderboy" Thompson repping this hybrid experiment, you know Karate Combat has to be legit.

Want to join the fun and get crypto tendies while watching gladiators? Here's the lowdown (with a healthy dose of skepticism):

  • Download the Karate Combat app (available for Android and iOS).

  • Claim your 88 FREE Karate Tokens (don't spend them all in one place).

  • Pick your favorite fighter before their next match. (Spoiler alert: it doesn't really matter who you pick)

  • Watch the epic battle royale unfold in the cutting-edge Karate Combat Pit (it's not a ring, it's not a cage, it's... something).

  • Sit back, relax, and enjoy the free fights (streamed directly on YouTube, because who needs fancy pay-per-view?)

Toncoin (TON) Skyrockets to All-Time High, Eyes $10 Milestone

Get hyped for Toncoin, the shitcoin💩 brainchild of the Telegram app dweebs! Its price pumped an astronomical 6.04% to hit $7.64 - barely enough for a Starbucks latte. But with an $18.5B market cap, at least it's richer than some banana republics!

Trading volume tanked, but who cares when the bagholder army grew 76.3%? Just look at those juicy "growth" metrics like 245.1% more active users (so like a dozen new guys). Toss in 26% more monopoly money flowing, some squiggly TA lines pointing up, and a random crypto influencer shilling it, and you've got a certified moon mission!

This blazing-fast ⚡️ user-friendly shitcoin from the big brains behind...messaging tech...could hit $10 any day according to Crypto King himself. Mortgage the house and buckle up!

Crypto News - Pay Attention!

$$$ AIRDROPS = FREE MONEY $$$


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Starting June 12, 2024, all subscribers will embark on their mining journey and share in a whopping 500,000 $BABYBONK tokens. Don’t miss out—subscribe now and start earning!

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*DISCLAIMER: None of this is financial advice. This newsletter is strictly for educational and entertainment purposes; it is not investment advice or a solicitation to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Please be careful and do your research.

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